Secrets
I think this may be unrealistic, but I’ve wonder if partners can have a relationship, where there are no secrets? I don’t just mean just plain vanilla secrets. I mean two people that lay themselves bare to each other.
They share rogue attractions, hidden hopes, dark desires, shabby needs, selfish wants, even that which disturbs us of the other. They admit insecurities, uncomfortable inklings, even allow themselves to be confronted on blind spots. More importantly, they admit to themselves each other, those deepest wounds they carry inside.
These “secrets” then become the garden of their partnership, where they grow endless fruit of acceptance and love and become better humans from one another. They tend the garden together. Raking pebbles so they’re seen and understood. Adjusting rocks and decorating them with vines so as to highlight their strengths versus their barriers. Tending around boulders; working with them and accepting them as permanent in the garden.
This garden is a place where each person dares to be vulnerable, not threatened by the other person’s “dark” interiors. What could be harder to do together then to expose the other to your shadowy interiors, difficult even to admit to ourselves? It’s a radical honesty. But one that could lead to becoming better for the other and growing in deep joy and self-acceptance.
I think we may need to learn how to do this with ourselves. Face our ourselves and we can face others.